 Friendships. They were easy to create as kids, don’t you think? You go to recess and find someone on the swings and start talking. Viola, you have a friend. Fast-forward to adulthood and swing sets are replaced by desks and fluorescent lights and conversions aren’t as easy.  It was His original idea. All because He recognized that it’s not good for us to be alone and He saw the importance of relationships (Genesis 2:28).
We’re wired to help each other, encourage each other and forgive each other. And we’re also wired to receive help, encouragement, and forgiveness. It’s all over Scripture (If you have time, consider spending a little more time reading these verses Colossians 3:13, Ecclesiastes 4:10, Romans 12:10, and Proverbs 27:17). If it’s part of God’s original plan for us, why is it so difficult to do?
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 It is at the crossroads of the ordinary obstacles that we have the opportunity to change the trajectory of our lives. We can take the everyday obstacles and turn them into purpose and use them for good. Oftentimes, we are forced in one direction or another and in those times, we can take a leap forward and create the beautiful life we want with what we have been handed. Instead of feeling stuck, we can take those obstacles and use them to propel forward. A lot of this is mindset and refining the tools we can cultivate within. The cliché of “we only have one life here” makes it even more necessary that we walk into our greatest selves and make it worth living. As a first generation Indian woman born and raised in the south, I faced the challenges that many ethnic groups faced and still face…but I knew as a little girl in Greeneville, TN that I was meant for a greater purpose. It was something in my heart that could never be shaken. And at 50 years old, it still is firmly planted. I had no identity-I wasn’t white and I wasn’t brown. In fact, I tried so hard to assimilate in the white American culture that I grew up with a lot of hate and anger towards my family, towards Indian people, towards white Americans. Pretty much everyone. I felt unseen and unheard for a large part of my teen and early adulthood. I was wronged in my career and by people who wanted to hurt me because of their own unhealed parts. The anger only ended up hurting myself and keeping me in a victim mentality. I couldn’t connect with people at the deepest level because my belief was that no one understood me. I didn’t even understand me fully---my power. And, if I harnessed that power for good, I could impact so many lives.  Here's what happened when I found God...
 Spring means it’s time to plant things. Fix up the yard. Finally put something in that empty pot in the front yard. I'm an amateur gardener at this point in my life. I have a small space in the yard with a few veggies sprouting up. There's an arch entryway with morning star jasmine trailing up the side. While I still plant things that don't survive and put things in the wrong place in my yard, for the most part I'm finally successful at keeping more things alive than not. But, I had to start somewhere. Years ago, when I planted my first real plant, my grandmother was the first one I called for advice. She's a green thumb if there ever was one and an expert when it comes to spring gardening.   As the pear and magnolia trees begin to blossom, and the daffodils, crocus, and hyacinth begin peeking through the earth to bloom, I find myself wanting to wander through the forest slowly soaking in the awe and wonder of spring. Not because I’ve got lots of extra time on my hands. But because I know I need to savor the truth that God is changing everything. And when I give myself permission to do this, to soak in the wonder of the certainly coming spring, I connect more deeply to that which is truest and deepest about myself. God is changing me, too. I don’t have to do everything. In fact, I cannot do everything. With every breath our creator so generously gives HE is reminding me I am accepted and empowered and I have the strength to keep going because HE is changing everything.
Do you need this reminder today, too? Does winter’s cold and darkness make you weary? Have you been in a long season of waiting and praying for something that still has not happened?
 One of the first times I ever heard the Holy Spirit’s voice was in my car.
I had just moved to Fort Mill, SC. I had no friends. I was angry and lonely, trying to figure out what I was doing in life, when I heard a soft whisper on the way home one day. I instantly felt safe and joy rushed over my body. Some of the questions I had been dealing with had just been answered directly and exactly when I needed them. This was the place where my prayer life began 𑁋 my car.  So often we feel like the writer of Ecclesiastes when he said, “I have seen all the things that are done under the sun; all of them are meaningless, a chasing after the wind (Ecclesiastes 1:14).” Circumstances like the loss of someone we love, suicide of a local teen, or war breaking out in Ukraine, make us stop and ask, “What is the point of life? Is there meaning in death?
Yet, God promises us that He can and is doing new things all the time (Ezekiel 36:26; 1 Cor. 5:17). So, maybe the Ecclesiastes scribe was wrong. What if what we do with our lives is not meaningless? What if suffering, and even death itself, does not occur in vain? Let me be honest…  You’ve probably heard that love isn’t a feeling, it’s a choice. Whoever said that was absolutely right. God chose to love us when we were unlovable. For those of us who are married, we know that we’re choosing to love our spouses even when the butterflies aren’t there or we’re stuck in the middle of an argument. Moms, we're loving our children when they’ve pitched a fit and disobeyed the rules. I'm sure we can all think of 100 instances we've chosen to love family, friends, coworkers, and even total strangers, when they weren't exactly lovable. For sure. Love is a choice. But, that doesn’t disqualify our feelings. Our emotional response to circumstances and people is actually a gift from God.  I always thought I was a broken girl because I was not free to feel.
 You are a person. I know it’s crazy. But, you are. You are a person with a soul and a calling and a God who loves you so much He appointed you to be in the exact season that you’re in.
We so often forget our humanity. Our microwave, media driven culture makes us think we can be awesome constantly and immediately. We should be robots that crush our goals, speed through to-do lists, get what we want out of life, and look awesome while we do it. However, the reality is that we are indeed human. We need rest. Life is hard and we cannot run from our emotions forever. We wake up with bedhead and bad breath. Where we want a resounding “YES!” God sometimes says “no,” “not right now,” or is even silent. Sometimes life knocks us down and we feel taken out of the fight.... So, what do we do?  Hi my name is Ellie and I loved being single.
While I was single, I really left my heart out on the dance floor. I gave it my all. And, by the time I met my husband, I could literally say that I had done everything that I wanted to do as a single person. Including collecting an incredible amount of… well let’s just say interesting… dating stories. Here’s one of my personal favorites. And, yes, this is real...  I'm about to say a bad word... (takes a deep breath).Ok, here it goes.
Intimacy.... As the calendar brings the month of February and Valentines Day back around to us once again, I'm stuck thinking about the word intimacy. Why do so many of us struggle with this word? Why is it hard for us to draw close to others, our spouse and to God? |
