 There are more days I wake up already feeling behind the ball than on top of it. It’s as if, no matter how fast I move, time won’t slow down enough to allow me to catch up to it.
You get it. We’re busy women! We have families and kids and jobs and homes and to-do’s and chores and food and then…. we toss in Christmas. A season of light, laughter, families and memories that we’ll so easily rush through if….
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 This is not the sharing of my two birth stories but rather, a sharing of God’s redeeming grace in and over all things nonetheless. A sharing of hope, of how the Lord brings beauty from ashes and makes all things new in accordance with His perfect plan.
Before divulging too much more, a disclaimer: There will be some details discussed from my two c-sections that could give rise to heavy emotions, thoughts, and feelings if you are in a delicate place processing your own birth, pregnancy, or postpartum experiences. My heart is for yours! God knows every emotion you are encountering. Nothing surprises Him or catches Him off guard. “For by him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities—all things were created through him and for him.” Colossians 1:16 As we come to understand with greater clarity what it looks like to hold grief and joy simultaneously, to live in the “already, but not yet”, we can affirm how that reality permeates different arenas of our every day lives. Our birth stories do not define us. But that doesn’t mean the very means in which the Lord chooses to use in refining us do not matter.  I recently was part of a relationship night where people submitted questions for me and
one of my friends to answer. We got this question that I ended up thinking about a lot. When I first read it, it seemed like the answer was obvious, but the more I thought about it and how I was going to answer, the deeper the answer seemed to become. This was the question….  When we got married, my husband and I decided to pour sand into a jar instead of lighting a unity candle. We took turns laying layer upon layer of tiny pebbles on top of each other to declare that our lives were so intertwined they'd be as impossible to separate as those tiny sand grains.
Through moving, decor rearranging, and just general time passing, the layers inside that jar are no longer straight and pretty. They've shifted into each other. They’re wavy and out of place. They're imperfect. Did you know that... |
