There’s something sacred about the table. It’s where stories surface, laughter spills, and sometimes—healing begins.
Around the table, we learn to ask questions that go beyond “How was your day?” We begin to ask, “How’s your heart?” As part of our “At the Table” series, I wanted to finish out our month strong by inviting you into a conversation that I was able to have with some incredible women at an event called Bloom in Charlotte, NC. As a part of a panel, I was asked a series of questions and wanted to share those responses here. Below you’ll find —a reflection on healing, identity, and what it means to walk with God through the long, slow process of becoming whole. If I were taking notes from what I shared at Bloom, this would be it. BUT if you want to listen to the full answers live, make sure you check out the Miracle in the Mess Podcast. May these questions and those at the very end of this blog spark your own At the Table conversations when you’re ready to share a little more heart and soul…
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Here’s my confession — I used to think I was an extrovert.
Mostly because I genuinely love people. I’ve always been up for a good party or hangout. For years, I worked as a camp counselor, followed by even more years in ministry. People are great! But then I got married to a true extrovert. After long stretches of social time, I’d feel the urge to disappear — to read a book, play music, or write alone. My husband, on the other hand, wanted to keep the evening going. “Should we invite someone else over? Grab dinner with friends?” he’d ask. His tank would be overflowing while mine was running on empty. Surprise! I’m actually pretty introverted — and I need quiet time to refuel. Still, I love hosting. Curating a cozy weekend hangout or cooking a meal for friends genuinely fills me with joy. Our home has an open-door feel, and our friends and neighbors know they’re welcome to pop in anytime. I’ve always loved Hebrews 13:2, which says: “Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it.” Extrovert, introvert, or somewhere in between — we’re all called to show hospitality. If we ignore that call, we might miss out on angels… or the very answers to our prayers walking through our doors. So yes, we open our homes. But if you’re like me, there comes a point when you need to recharge from all that “people-ing.” With the holiday season approaching, how can we love others well and protect our own peace? Here are a few gentle, introvert-friendly ways to host without burning out: 
News feeds are full of fighting. Families are already split over politics, and group text threads are heavy with tension about who to avoid at upcoming holiday gatherings. Even in our neighborhoods, where we once waved and said, “Hey Bob, how are ya?”—now we avert our eyes, hurry to our cars, and escape into the next thing.
Across America, people are dodging personal connection out of fear of conflict—yet at the same time, we dash to our phones to fire off opinionated comments at strangers on social media. In a world pulling apart, what if the Church led the way in pulling chairs closer? Remembering Connection Before ScreensBefore social media, I had to ask my parents or friends about everything. By the time dial-up internet connected, I could’ve already gotten an answer from my mom and hopped on my bike for a neighborhood ride. When my perspective was off, someone who loved me corrected me and steered me straight. Now, we carry lightning-fast computers in our pockets. Any question, any opinion—seconds away. Then we curate feeds that echo back what we already believe. Before long, we’ve built an entire worldview reinforced not by people who know us, but by algorithms. And here’s the problem…  Dear Sister,
Truth Moment: sisterhood can be messy! I had a little sister for 40 years. And boy, could we fight. Like knock-down-drag-out, stop touching my stuff, no you can’t go with me to the mall - FIGHT! But no one could wedge a fight between us. We were sisters! She was also the person that knew me better than a lot of other people. She knew my hopes and my dreams. She knew when I was hurting and when I was winning. She knew I was having twins before I did. And was there to support me when life got heavy. She was my sister. My sister passed on December 23, 2022, and even though we lived across the country from each other, her departure has given a different weight to the term sisterhood. So, what does sisterhood really mean...?  Friendships. They were easy to create as kids, don’t you think? You go to recess and find someone on the swings and start talking. Viola, you have a friend. Fast-forward to adulthood and swing sets are replaced by desks and fluorescent lights and conversions aren’t as easy.  It was His original idea. All because He recognized that it’s not good for us to be alone and He saw the importance of relationships (Genesis 2:28).
We’re wired to help each other, encourage each other and forgive each other. And we’re also wired to receive help, encouragement, and forgiveness. It’s all over Scripture (If you have time, consider spending a little more time reading these verses Colossians 3:13, Ecclesiastes 4:10, Romans 12:10, and Proverbs 27:17). If it’s part of God’s original plan for us, why is it so difficult to do?  You’ve probably heard that love isn’t a feeling, it’s a choice. Whoever said that was absolutely right. God chose to love us when we were unlovable. For those of us who are married, we know that we’re choosing to love our spouses even when the butterflies aren’t there or we’re stuck in the middle of an argument. Moms, we're loving our children when they’ve pitched a fit and disobeyed the rules. I'm sure we can all think of 100 instances we've chosen to love family, friends, coworkers, and even total strangers, when they weren't exactly lovable. For sure. Love is a choice. But, that doesn’t disqualify our feelings. Our emotional response to circumstances and people is actually a gift from God.  I always thought I was a broken girl because I was not free to feel.
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